Who Pooped the Bed or How I Sat Through Pacific Rim

Guillermo Del Toro's latest offering.

Trailer below:


The trailer gives the setup fairly well. Giant monsters referred to as Kaiju are coming through a hole in the Pacific Ocean referred to as the Breach. The governments of the world work together to build a program to fight the Kaiju. The fighting is done in Yaegers (giant robots). Each Yaeger is piloted by two people, because the load of interfacing with the robot is too much for one person's brain to handle alone. When two people pilot a Yaeger they are connected through an interface called the Drift, which allows each pilot to be totally aware of everything in the other's mind.

At first the program goes well, but the Kaiju that come through the Breach keep getting bigger and nastier, and we start losing. Yada yada. Giant robots fight giant monsters. Enough said?

The acting from top to bottom in this movie is dreadful. Sorry, Charlie (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0206359/?ref_=tt_cl_t5). The script is awful. It could have been written by anyone in a public school 5th grade class. The actors don't do anything to heighten the material they are given, most of them overselling the part, and some just not having the chops to be on the screen in the first place.

The computer effects are outstanding, to be sure, but that seems to be all that mattered in this film. Several times I found myself laughing out loud at inappropriate moments, because of how ridiculous it was. My only positive thought walking out of the theater was that my nephew (in elementary school) would really enjoy this movie. After seeing this I am really sad that Legendary Pictures is making the new Godzilla movie.

Speaking of Godzilla, there was one interesting moment toward the beginning of the movie. They mentioned that when the Kaiju die they secrete an oily blue liquid that had come to be called Kaiju Blue. I thought the reference to that was going to lead us somewhere. Perhaps the Kaiju Blue rapidly converts greenhouse gasses into oxygen, and the Kaiju are destroying cities around the world for a reason. After all, Gojira himself was an eco-terrorist. I'll save you the time; that angle doesn't go anywhere.

This movie gets no better than 2 stars **.



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